When tickets for the first Gang of Youths shows in Australia in four years went on sale last month, a one-off show in Thirroul sold out in 45 seconds; two shows at Sydney Opera House went in minutes. Though I have loved the band for years, I was surprised by how emotional it was to see them play on home soil again in Sydney. Dave Le’aupepe, who has a claim to being the country’s most charismatic frontman, seemed to sense the mood. “Thank you for loving me,” he told the audience. “I know it’s very difficult.”

As I left the show, bewildered and tearful, I locked eyes with a stranger in the foyer who was also crying. Without saying a word, we both burst out laughing; feeling a bit silly, perhaps, but also a sense of wonder at our shared reaction. I later heard there were two marriage proposals in that audience; I wouldn’t be surprised if there were more.

I last interviewed Le’aupepe in 2021, fresh out of lockdown in London, where Gang of Youths had decamped to en masse to escape their booming fame in Australia which Le’aupepe told me had “fucked me up really badly”. We were speaking ahead of the release of their last album, 2022’s angel in realtime, a grand, maximalist rock album about Le’aupepe’s dead father, his family’s hidden history and his Polynesian heritage. It was laden with emotion, as was Le’aupepe: he spoke with the hard fervour of a preacher, voicing all of his misgivings – about his voice, their past songs, their albums, their fame.

But five years later, Le’aupepe looks noticeably relaxed and content; with that head of hair, there is something of a sleepy lion about him. He’s 34 now, and trying to be healthy. “No booze, no cigs. I fucking hate it,” he says cheerfully. He is also aware of an internal shift. “Last time we spoke, I was fraught because everything had so much fucking meaning – and it did, I guess,” he smiles. “The best possible way to be is to not give a fuck.”

We’re speaking ahead of the release of their first song in four years, a silky three-minute single titled Things Take Time, out on Wednesday. “There’s heaven in the suburbs,” Le’aupepe croons on the track, which was a test on two fronts: could he, a famously wordy lyricist, write a song that “wasn’t really about anything”, and could he write a pop song? The result is Gang of Youths as you have never heard them before.

“I need to know – does it sound like a cynical gesture towards pop radio stardom?” Le’aupepe asks. I don’t think so; it sounds like a happy man in a happy band. “Yeah, weirdly,” he says. “I’m not used to that.”

While there are plenty of catchy Gang of Youths songs, Le’aupepe had never written a pop song and was curious about the architecture and mechanics of doing so. “I was drawn to the idea of actually writing songs for a change, instead of these fucking moods with a bunch of fucking moody lyrics,” he laughs. “I’m at the stage of my life – I think we all are – where we want to make art, not a diary.

“So taking all my ideas and lyrical concepts and metaphysical fucking curiosities and condensing that into a three-minute song – that was my Everest.”

Things Take Time was inspired by an offhand joke from lead guitarist and keyboardist Jung Kim while they were sitting in one of their back yards: hey Dave, write a song about plants. “I was like, fuck off!” Le’aupepe says – but then he got to thinking about how they had settled in their respective homes, started families and how their blooming gardens were evidence that they’d finally put down roots. As Le’aupepe puts it, “the song is about things growing and dying, but also what happens if somebody’s just overwhelmingly OK”.

Tom Hobden, who plays violin, guitar and keyboards in the band, calls Things Take Time “an exercise in restraint”.

“It was a conscious decision not to be so grandiose and actually let Dave’s voice carry the song,” he says, “rather than ramming in a gazillion things.”

“Look at his fucking smile!” says Le’aupepe.

“Well, I am excited about it,” says Hobden. “It might sound stupid, but I think what’s going to strike people about this record is how much you actually get to sing.”

“I do a lot of that talking garbage,” Le’aupepe adds – and while there are plenty of fans of that talking garbage, Le’aupepe has impressive pipes, though he doesn’t know it. “I have always been really fucking self-conscious in my voice. I still really struggle with it. But this was liberating.”

Things Take Time was recorded in Hobden’s back yard studio in London. “Dave would be in there for hours and then come out and everyone would be wondering what he’s building in there,” Hobden says. “And then I’d sneak in, open the sessions, and see: take 389. Bloody hell.”

“I cop all this shit for being a fucking perfectionist, but it’s not a joke. I really struggle with it,” Le’aupepe adds. “But for the first time, I’m not worrying how this will be received. Will people like it? Will we be able to do X, Y, Z? That’s not really part of the equation for me any more.”

Le’aupepe made a 300-track playlist for the band spanning their bedrock – Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Bruce Springsteen, Nick Cave, The Go-Betweens – and some surprises. “I made everyone listen to bloody Perry Como over and over again,” Le’aupepe says. “Yo La Tengo, Warren Zevon, Glen Campbell – Wichita Lineman is the greatest fucking song ever written. How do cunts come up with something so miraculous?”

“We just want zen these days,” Kim adds. “We’re not as self-conscious about what our output is. Like, we played the Bloodhound Gang in the studio! It is liberating to not be overly shy about what you genuinely enjoy.”

The band “went down a rabbit hole trying to find a sound that was simpler so that I could sing,” Le’aupepe says, and shed the baggage of what Gang Of Youths should sound like along the way. The result is “the most fun I’ve ever had doing a record,” he says. “We loved each other, and we loved it. Being in that studio felt fucking sacred.”

This doesn’t seem to be a one off either; the band played three new songs at that equally sacred Opera House show. And as Le’aupepe told that ecstatic crowd: “You’ll have to come back and see us next year …”

• Things Take Time by Gang of Youths is out now