Photograph: Shaw & Shaw Photograph: Action images
This pub is on a little back lane near Newcastle Central station. I only discovered it recently. The atmosphere is amazing. They do real ales, including local ones, and play brilliant, alternative music on the jukebox: I can’t remember the last time I stood in a bar and heard Frank Ocean come on. It’s such a great pub that it’s almost certainly on the cusp of being ruined.
• The Town Wall, Pink Lane, NE1 5HX, thetownwall.com
Photograph: Shaw & Shaw Photograph: Action images
This is a really grungy, indie music venue under the Byker Bridge – sweat pouring off the walls, dirt everywhere, toilets that look like they’ve been pulled from a 1930s train station. It attracts a young crowd and pretty much every up-and-coming indie band. I went there all the time when I was at college and university: I saw Bloc Party, The Cribs and the Arctic Monkeys.
• The Cluny, 36 Lime Street, Ouseburn, NE1 2PQ thecluny.com Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
When I was starting out in standup, Newcastle didn’t have much of a comedy scene – there was just a grungy bar called the Dog and Parrot, and a club called the Hyena, which is stag and hen central. Playing there is like a gruelling training session in how to handle hecklers. Then, as soon as I moved to Manchester, they opened this place, linked to the other Stand clubs in Edinburgh and Glasgow. It’s brilliantly run, a joy to perform in – and they have a fantastic bistro upstairs. Try the eggs Benedict and Wagyu burgers.
• The Stand Comedy Club, 31 High Bridge, NE1 1EW thestand.co.uk Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
This is a beautiful theatre which puts on everything from panto to Shakespeare to comedy. I’ve been going to watch the Theatre Royal panto with my mam every December since I was four years old; and I’ve seen a good few comedians here, including Ross Noble and Lee Evans. I’m doing two gigs of my own at the theatre in June and I still can’t believe it.
• Theatre Royal, 100 Grey Street, NE1 6BR theatreroyal.co.uk Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
Newcastle’s quayside has been redeveloped since I was young. There are some great bars and restaurants along there now, and you can see right along the Tyne to The Sage arts centre and Baltic gallery in Gateshead. On a fine night, there’s nothing quite like strolling along the quayside and seeing the Millennium Bridge all lit up.
•newcastlequayside.co.uk Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
A brilliant independent cafe on Grey Street, opposite the Theatre Royal. They have live music and comedy. I did a gig there once and got paid in cake. It was a good deal – their Malteser slab, drizzled in white chocolate, blows my mind. The tea’s spot on, too, as are the pastas, panini and salads. It’s one of those lovely little quirky places where every chair’s different.
• Blake's Coffee House, 53 Grey Street, NE1 6EE Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
There’s something for all the family here. They have exhibitions on everything from biology to chemistry, theatre shows and a winter ice-rink just outside, on Times Square. It’s a great day out. There’s even a nightclub next door called Digital – so you can drop off the kids at the museum and go clubbing!
• Life Science Centre, Times Square, NE1 4EP life.org.uk Photograph: Shaw & Shaw
