Circle of life news, finally, with tales from Beverly Hills and Bradford. To the former, first, where huge congratulations are in order to an outfit called Julien's Auctions. These LA dealers have somehow found the strength to move on after Michael Jackson's doctor was convicted of involuntary manslaughter this week, and are selling the singer's death bed, along with some furniture "smeared with his makeup".

But it is the news from Bradford that has left Lost in Showbiz most speechless. To wit, the chap who arranged Jimmy Savile's funeral cortege once wrote to the TV presenter as a child. According to what he tells the Bradford Telegraph & Argus, Robert Morphet asked Jim to fix it for him to be an undertaker for a day.

As Jimmy was wont to say: "I can do better than that …"